If I Walk Away...Albus !

[benoite guinevere rowle]

I'm not coming back,

[/color]
I've done something so terrible, I'm terrified to speak.

I'm mixed up, I'll be blunt,[/color]
Right now the rain is just washing you out of my hair and out of my mind.[/color]

She didn't know how it had come to this, she should have run; she really should have. Her brother had found out about her relationship with Albus Potter, and then all hell broke loose. He tried just to cut her off from everything over the summer, but it didn't work. Owls were smarter then he was apparently. So, he tried reasoning with her, bringing up her mother and father, and how they would never approve of this. When that didn't work, he struck her. And, it also did nothing but bruise her face, the mark still hadn't gone away. Then, he resorted to magic. She'd been thrown all over the room, cut up in all sorts of places, and banged against every surface in the room. Nothing changed her mind, she loved who she loved and it didn't matter to her if they killed her. But, he couldn't have one of his precious kids just end up dead, it would raise too many questions. So, he resorted to threats, Albus would end up coming off the wrong side of someone's wand if she didn't end it. She didn't believe him at first, but the more she thought about it, the more it worried her. She had bitten her nails down to the ends, she hadn't slept, and one could just tell overall she was not doing well. She looked rough, and she had to go back to school. He reminded her of the threat as she left, and she worried even more.

So, what was she to do? Give him a chance to kill him? No, she couldn't. She could take all the beatings in the world, but if he was going to die, she couldn't live with that. She just avoided him at first, hoping he would go find someone who would pay attention to him, but she knew this wouldn't work, it wasn't how they worked. She knew she looked awful, maybe if he were more shallow, he would have left for that reason, but he wasn't. So, eventually she just stopped trying to talk to anyone. She didn't make eye contact, and she just hoped maybe if she didn't sleep enough, she would just wither away, and everyone would be okay. She didn't know where to go from here, maybe she should take her mother's way out and toss herself off the roof of the castle, or fall off a broom. Make it looks like an accident, or fowl play and get her "father" brought to light. Either way, maybe it would just work itself out.

Now? The common room was empty, and she sat alone by the fire. In the dim light she knew anyone coming by could see the bags under her eyes, the fact she'd lost some weight wasn't really too noticeable, she was a bag of bones as it was. She just looked lost in her own world, and as it were, she was. She didn't know where she could turn, but she knew she had to do something, even if that meant letting herself go. She just couldn't live like this, or watch him die, it wasn't an option.

[/center][/size][/blockquote][/blockquote]

Tags: Albus!
Words: some!
Outfit: Here!
Lyrics: Remembering Sunday - All Time Low!
Credits: Me![/font][/size]

[albus]

The fact that you saw the world
affected your decisions

[/b][/size][/font]

but it wasn't your fault
wasn't in your intentions[/b][/font]
[/center]

Albus couldn't help but feel slightly frustrated. He couldn't find her on the train, and she wasn't at dinner. He had looked everywhere in that damn castle for Benoite, and she was still nowhere to be found. After a long summer of putting up with his git of a brother and sending letters back and forth, Al just wanted to see Benoite more than anything. Didn't she want to see him too? After all this time, Al was under the impression that she was avoiding him. Had he done something to upset her? Or was it more than that? Was she even at Hogwarts?

Defeated and tired, the middle Potter retreated back to the Slytherin common room early. He dragged his feet, trudging down to the dungeons and ignoring some of the stares and glares from younger students. He supposed they'd heard of him: the only Potter or Weasley to ever be placed in Slytherin. They would get over it soon enough, though, and they would find something else to gawk at it. That was how it always happened.

Reaching the entrance, Al mumbled the password and sauntered down the steps. It was no different than he remembered it: dark, dreary, and tinted green… but ironically sort of comfortable. He had thought he would be the only one in there, but when Albus turned his head, he spotted somebody sitting by the fire. He froze, examining the figure, but it didn't take long for him to recognize her when the fire flashed in his direction. No more than a few seconds later, he realized that something was very wrong. His frustration was instantly replaced by worry.

"Ben…?" Al whispered, his bright green eyes large as he rushed forward to her side. He kneeled beside her and placed a hand on her arm. She didn't look good. She looked like she been in some sort of struggle, and Al started trembling at the thought of anyone touching her. He bit his lip, hoping she would look at him. "Benoite, what's happened to you? You look terrible! Where on earth have you been?"

tagged?! benoite </3
work count?! 344
wearing?! first picture
lyrics?! how to love, lil wayne
credit?! me

[benoite guinevere rowle]

I'm not coming back,

[/color]
I've done something so terrible, I'm terrified to speak.

I'm mixed up, I'll be blunt,[/color]
Right now the rain is just washing you out of my hair and out of my mind.[/color]

Someone was coming. She should go back to her bed, pull the drapes, and wait for the night to pass like the rest had. Sleep sometimes came, usually when she just couldn't stay awake anymore. She was getting tired of everything, she just wanted to run away, she didn't want to be in the open anymore, she just wanted to disappear and never come back. She hung her head, and she didn't know how any of it got this bad, she figured it just was her fault. Everything was, she knew that much. She kept her head low, just hoping the person in the room would just walk past her. She didn't know who it was, but when he approached her, she did. His voice made her tense, she almost figured someone would pop out of the wall and blow them both away before they knew what could happen, but they were alone, or so she thought, and they were at school. Not too much could happen here...right?

"Albus." She said lowly, her voice cracking from misuse. She hadn't spoken for hours, she couldn't remember the last time she really talked to someone, since before school for sure. She was more silent then she usually was. She slowly lifted her head, smiling weakly. "At home. Where else would I have been?" She said, acting as though she didn't look like she'd been beaten up. "It was a rough summer." She said, dropping her face again. She didn't want to elaborate, but now that she'd been spotted, she figured she probably would have to elaborate, but she didn't want to. She just wanted to run away, and she just wanted to be with him, and she just didn't want any of this to be real.

She hung her head, and she didn't really know what else to say. "Did you have a good summer?" She said with a small smile, trying to make everything seem like it was okay. Anyone could tell by looking at her it's not okay, but she couldn't really know where to start, she just couldn't end it, she just wanted to disappear and make him forget her, was that too much to ask?

[/center][/size][/blockquote][/blockquote]

Tags: Albus!
Words: some!
Outfit: Here!
Lyrics: Remembering Sunday - All Time Low!
Credits: Me![/font][/size]

[albus]

The fact that you saw the world
affected your decisions

[/b][/size][/font]

but it wasn't your fault
wasn't in your intentions[/b][/font]
[/center]

The way she said his name worried Al greatly. This was so unlike her; even the way she sounded was wrong. This was not the confident, strong-willed, and beautiful girl that he had left at the end of last year. Of course she was still beautiful, but the girl he had kissed months ago at King's Cross was very different from the one seated before him. Benoite was so visibly weak that Albus was afraid, for the first time since he had known her, to touch her. The fragile crack in her voice made Al pull his arm away from her. What had happened to her?

"I don't mean this summer," he explained, honestly saddened by Benoite's broken disposition. He reached up and very gently put the tips of his fingers to her chin, pulling her to look at him. "I meant all day. I didn't see you on the train, and I couldn't find you at the sorting ceremony or dinner. I…." He pulled away from her again, his green eyes narrowing. "I thought you might have been avoiding me, and now I think I know why."

Sighing slightly, Albus stood and took a seat next to her. He looked down at his feet, then looked back up at the girl that meant the world to him. "I don't want to talk about summer," he said. "I want to talk about what's wrong with you. Ben, you're all beaten up, and you just look… unhealthy. That worries me. Please…" he held out his hand, hoping she would take it… "tell me what happened. Who did this to you?"

Al didn't mean for that last sentence to sound so angry, but he couldn't help it. If somebody had hurt her (and he had a good feeling that he was right), then he would hexing the living hell out of that person. It didn't matter who it was. Benoite had always been tough enough to stand up for herself, and now suddenly she wasn't; that was wrong. Albus placed his hands between his knees, trying desperately to stop them from shaking, but he couldn't take his eyes away from Benoite.

tagged?! benoite </3
work count?! idunno
wearing?! first picture
lyrics?! how to love, lil wayne
credit?! me

[benoite guinevere rowle]

I'm not coming back,

[/color]
I've done something so terrible, I'm terrified to speak.

I'm mixed up, I'll be blunt,[/color]
Right now the rain is just washing you out of my hair and out of my mind.[/color]

Now he sounded angry. Good, maybe it was for the best. Maybe he would just leave her, and then she could just wither away like she wanted to. She shouldn't have come back to school, once at King's Cross she should have bolted. She could have gotten away, the trace is off of her, she's old enough. She could have made it to France and blended into their society fine, she spoke French, she could have made it work. She should have, she didn't belong here anymore, he was angry at her, not that she could blame him; she'd run from him most of the day, but she didn't really want to be seen like this, but it seemed too late for that now. "Train, yes well I was with my brothers, they thought it best to not let me alone for most of the trip, I would have come find you otherwise.." She knew they were watching her for per her "fathers'" orders, she was taking risks even talking to Albus now. "Haven't felt much like food recently either, so I just came straight here." She said, trying to keep her head low. When he raised her eyes to meet his, she was quite certain he could see more of the bruising on her face, and she didn't like that fact, but she didn't want to pull away either.

He pulled his hand away. She did look bad, and she knew it. Nothing broke her heart more then seeing him taking his touch away from her, but this was just the beginning, that much she did know. "I look bad, Oui?" She said, wanting to sink into the floor. He moved, she expected him to leave, but he sat. She looked at him as he did, and she swallowed, she didn't know how to go about any of this, he wanted to help, and she wanted him to, but if she told him...he couldn't ever look at her the same again, that much she knew to be true. "That's a loaded question, Albus." She said with another weak smile, taking his hand as he offered it. "It..was my brother, my oldest brother." Well, she started it, now she just sort of had to tell him now.

"The Minister is really my brother, not a father figure. He's my half-brother, as are the others in the house I've called siblings. All of us have the same father; and I didn't want to listen to what the oldest one told me, so when I wouldn't stop doing what he told me to, so he tried to...make me see it his way.." She couldn't look at him while she explained that, she didn't want to elaborate any further, but what choice would she have if he asked more questions?

[/center][/size][/blockquote][/blockquote]

Tags: Albus!
Words: some!
Outfit: Here!
Lyrics: Remembering Sunday - All Time Low!
Credits: Me![/font][/size]

[albus]

The fact that you saw the world
affected your decisions

[/b][/size][/font]

but it wasn't your fault
wasn't in your intentions[/b][/font]
[/center]

Albus knew he had messed up when Benoite responded to him. He considered reaching out to her again, but he was too worried that he would break her. He coupled his hands together and pulled them to his stomach, trying his best to hold back the frustration and worry overwhelming him. Benoite looked like her heart had been completely shattered, and he didn't know what to do about it. He had never been faced with a situation like this before—to have somebody he loved so much distant and hardly responsive. After all, Albus had never known somebody so like… himself.

"No, you don't," he said, shaking his head. "You look just as beautiful as always… but you also look like you've been in a fight."

Then, Benoite took his hand and smiled weakly, and just seconds later, she confirmed his fears. It… was my brother, my oldest brother. The words replayed in Albus's mind again and again, and for some reason, he could not understand. He had never met her family, and they had rarely spoken about relatives at all; it had never seemed important, really. But to think that her older brother had actually had the audacity to hit her? Sure, Al, James, and Lily had had their share of fights… but nothing like this. This was different.

As Benoite explained the situation to him, Albus suddenly felt riddled with anger. His eyebrows knitted together, and his green eyes glazed slightly. The minister?! He didn't care who the hell he was! If he ever showed his face, Albus certainly wouldn't hold back. How dare he! How dare he do this to his own sister! The rage building up inside of him almost put Al at a loss for words, and his ears began to turn dark red.

"W-what?" he mumbled, trying to steady his breathing. "That bastard laid his filthy hands on you? I'll kill him!" He stared at her, eyes wide and jaw dropped. "Nobody touches you like that! Ever! What could it have possibly been that he wanted you to stop doing so badly? So badly that he beat you? Benoite, tell me!"

Al's hands wouldn't stop shaking as they held hers. He was so upset that he couldn't come up with reasonable solutions. He couldn't even think straight, and for whatever reason, that prompted Albus to wonder what sort of family Benoite really came from. What brother would hit his own sister? What father or mother would let it happen?

"Who is this guy?" he demanded, cocking his head slightly. "Not the minister. Who's your father?"

tagged?! benoite </3
work count?! um. a lot. >.>
wearing?! first picture
lyrics?! how to love, lil wayne
credit?! me

[benoite guinevere rowle]

I'm not coming back,

[/color]
I've done something so terrible, I'm terrified to speak.

I'm mixed up, I'll be blunt,[/color]
Right now the rain is just washing you out of my hair and out of my mind.[/color]

A fight was putting it lightly. If he thought this was bad, he should see the rest of her, or perhaps not. He still found her a little attractive, why ruin that by showing off the scratches, bruises and overall just ruined skin. How was she supposed to be this lovely lady her brother expected her to be when he beat her to the point she looked hideous? He should get his priorities in order. What would he tell people who saw her now? She didn't care, really. He was just a monster, and she was too, and she just needed to go. "I'm surprised you can still call me beautiful." She said, not really picking her eyes up. "A fight is one way to think of it, but generally fights are two-sided." She didn't fight back; she valued her life more then that.

His demeanor changed, and she forced herself to withdraw a bit, that was the same reaction her brother started with. There was a time when anger didn't phase her, but fears were learned, and after this summer, she knew anger meant she could get hurt. She recoiled into the couch a little bit, and honestly started to brace herself for some sort of blow, but then, she realized whose company she was in. She believed him above lashing out at her, he was not like her brother, he was a better person; a far better person. Far better then she deserved in her life. He seemed shocked, but she couldn't really blame him; on the outside, the Minister was supposed to be a good person, and this was what he was really like. Surprise, life sucks doesn't it? "Please do." Was about all she could say. "He would disarm me, and slam me into things, hit me with things, and sometimes I'd black out and wake up on the floor, I really don't remember most of what happened, but I'd wake up burned, or tied up, or he'd lock me up and starve me. But, I'm here, and away from him now, so what does it matter now?" No one would believe her if she said it to anyone who wasn't Albus, that much she did know. She was just a lying little Orphan, who would care about her in the long run?

"I appreciate your concern, but there's not much anyone can do to stop him." She said saidly. She lifted her eyes, pulling herself from the couch, leaning forward again. She lifted a hand from where he held hers, and placed it to his face. She knew this was soon to come to an end, and she was having a hard time believing she was going to walk away from this. She felt her eyes starting to fill with tears, and she knew this was it; he would know she was a monster, and she couldn't really deal with that. She covered her mouth, and the tears spilled from her eyes. "My father's name was Tom Riddle..." She said, her voice hitching. "I'm so sorry, Albus."

She breathed deeply, trying to control herself, "The thing I was beaten for was us; I wouldn't end it, so he said if I wouldn't, he'd beat me until I did." There, it was all out there. Now, she could just sit back and watch her world fall apart, now there it was, her brother won again, and once again she was just a lost little orphan like she was meant to be from the start.

[/center][/size][/blockquote][/blockquote]

Tags: Albus!
Words: some!
Outfit: Here!
Lyrics: Remembering Sunday - All Time Low!
Credits: Me![/font][/size]

[albus]

The fact that you saw the world
affected your decisions

[/b][/size][/font]

but it wasn't your fault
wasn't in your intentions[/b][/font]
[/center]

When Benoite began to doubt her own beauty, Albus looked at her sadly. There was nobody in the entire world whose beauty measured even close to hers. She was gorgeous—inside and out—and Albus was shocked to hear that she didn't feel the same. His shock only grew when she referred to the "fight" as one-sided. For as long as Al had known Benoite, she had always stood up for herself. The very idea that this man could put such fear in her was mind-boggling. If Benoite was tough, this man must be…

He was torn from his thoughts as Benoite withdrew from him. Al watched her curiously for a moment, and that's when he noticed… she seemed afraid. Watching her recoil into the couch made Albus realize that he had been the one to scare her. His heart pounded against his ribcage, screaming at him for frightening her. How could he be so stupid? After all she had been through, he had actually raised his voice to her! Naturally, in response, Albus withdrew as well. He couldn't let his infamous Weasley temper take over. He was supposed to be there for her.

But then Benoite went on about all the horrible things that her brother had done to her. He stared at her, jaw-dropped and trembling, as she described the abuse. Albus pictured it in his head, and it only made him more and more upset. That was it. When vacation came around and when the school year ended, Albus was taking Benoite home with him. He would never let this happen again. He should have known something was wrong when her letters started becoming briefer and fewer. It was his fault that this went on.

"You're never going back there again…" he insisted, shaking his head. "You're going back to Godric's Hallow with me, and I'm telling my dad what he—"

He stopped, freezing as Benoite took her hand away and placed it on his face. It sent the strangest, most uncomfortable shiver down his spine, because when he looked at her, he could tell that things were far worse than he had originally thought. She looked as though she wanted to disappear, and there were actual tears in her dark eyes. It frightened Al. Just looking into her gaze made him feel like a small child who had just woken up from a nightmare.

Benoite covered her mouth, the tears spilling over, and Al's own eyes filled up at the sight. What was happening? He opened his mouth to attempt to speak, but that was when Benoite finally spoke up.

"My father's name was Tom Riddle.… I'm so sorry, Albus."

At first, he was so sure that he had heard her wrong. After all, it make any sense; the logic didn't add up. He scoffed at her, hoping she was joking. However, once Benoite continued explaining, the words sunk in all the way. Benoite didn't ever crack jokes. The reality hit him like a brick across the face, and he jumped away from her like he had just been struck. He stumbled backwards, but maintained his balance, and crossed a hand to his chest. His heart sunk to the pit of his stomach, and he was sure the pain he was feeling there was because it was shattering into pieces.

"W-what?" he breathed, bright eyes frightened and wide. "You're father is who?" Suddenly, Al felt dirty inside and out. Voldemort. The man who had killed his grandparents and who had caused the deaths of his great uncles and Uncle Fred. Voldemort was Benoite's father, and Albus Potter had been in a relationship with her. He thought he was going to be sick. His stomach twisted up painfully, and his throat tightened. He involuntarily let out a groan that almost sounded inhuman.

"You're lying!" Albus screamed at her, not caring if anyone heard. "YOU'RE LYING!" His neck twisted to the right, and he clenched his fingers so tightly that his nails were digging into his palms. Nevertheless, no matter how hard Albus tried to deny it, he knew very well that Benoite wasn't lying, and that was because he understood her so well. He was connected to her just like his father was connected to Voldemort. The thought was sickening. Suddenly, his anger was so huge that he didn't care what he said or did. His seemingly undying trust had been absolutely crushed in a matter of seconds.

"How could you keep this from me?!" he hissed, narrowing his gaze. "Do you even remember who my dad is?! Or my family, for that matter! They're all Potters and Weasleys! Do you realize the damage you've done?! I'm already the black-sheep of the family, and once they find out that the girl I'm dating is… Tom Riddle's daughter…! They— You— UGH!"

A shiver ran very violently throughout Albus's entire body. He shuddered and took another step backwards, his heart pounding and his mind racing. He couldn't even look at her anymore. The odds just wouldn't stop stacking up against him, and he really couldn't take it anymore. He was the only Potter or Weasley to ever be sorted into Slytherin. He was a parselmouth, while nobody else in his family was; the only reason Harry had once been was because of his connection to Voldemort. And now he had this undying attraction to Tom Riddle's daughter. Al threw his hands to his temples, shutting his eyes tightly. There had to be something wrong with him. He was so different from his siblings.

"Get away from me!" he hollered, gritting his teeth together and pointing away. "Just go!"

tagged?! benoite </3
work count?! meh ;-;
wearing?! first picture
lyrics?! how to love, lil wayne
credit?! me

[benoite guinevere rowle]

I'm not coming back,

[/color]
I've done something so terrible, I'm terrified to speak.

I'm mixed up, I'll be blunt,[/color]
Right now the rain is just washing you out of my hair and out of my mind.[/color]

She really just didn't know what to do now, he was going to find out who she was, and this was going to be it. She couldn't handle this, he was the only thing she cared about, she didn't have friends, she didn't have family, she had him, but that wasn't going to last much longer. He told her to come home with him, but she knew within a few minutes he would take that back, he had to. No one could accept her for who she was, she didn't blame them. She didn't accept herself for who she was, so no one else could. She should have figured that, she just wanted to get this over with. Now...would he tell his father? She could just be killed, maybe she would do the world a favor and just die, she really didn't know how she would just kill herself, she'd heard it was very hard to do, she did value herself at least a little bit.

She then heard him start to lose it. She didn't blame him, she just wanted, this to be over. "What was I going to tell you? "My father is the embodyment of evil and killed people your family loves, let's be friends!" I'm sure that would go over really well, hm?" She said, a slight edge to her voice, but the edge just sounded more or less exhausted. She didn't have the energy to get mad. "You associated with me as much as I did with you; but if you helps your case, don't tell them, or just kill me. Do the world a favor, I'm just a monster anyhow." She said, pushing herself out of the couch's comfort.

She pushed herself off the couch, and ran her fingers into her hair, "You don't have to shout, I'm leaving." She crossed her arms, and pulled her shirt closer to her, "Adieu, Albus." She said, a sad note of finality in her voice as she disappeared towards her dorm. This hadn't gone at all well, maybe it was best if she just left Hogwarts, she really didn't know what to do now.

[/center][/size][/blockquote][/blockquote]

Tags: Albus!
Words: some!
Outfit: Here!
Lyrics: Remembering Sunday - All Time Low!
Credits: Me![/font][/size]